Kansas Crimson

So there’s a wedding tonight, apparently bringing union to the buttacream gang.

Damn near every guest today has pastel polos, pleated shorts, and boat shoes.

Hi, I’m calling cuz I wanna do one of y’all’s fishing trips.

Excellent sir, we’d be glad to have you!

Now before I book, I want you to know that I wanna catch some bass!

Well I’m sorry sir, but there are no bass at this elevation. The nearest bass fishing would be a couple hours away.

Well what kinda fish DO y’all have?

We have trout, sir, which are a gorgeous fish that are a lot of fun to catch on a fly rod.

Well I’ve done plenty of bait fishing for bass, and how much different can fly fishing be?

Actually it’s very different, sir, but if you’d like we’d be glad to teach you how.

Okay I’ll try it. Put me down for Friday. K bye.

Hang on, sir, could I please get some info to create the reservation?

Actually, I called you in the middle of breakfast so now’s not a good time for me.

*click*

Hi there, we gots a group of 20 and we wanna book one of y’all’s fishing trips. But before we do, we want you to know we expect solitude. We don’t want no crowds on our trip!

You mean like, no crowds besides your group of 20 lined up along a small mountain stream?

could just as easily go in the great outdoors thread, but think it fits better here:

ousdahl wrote: ↑Fri Sep 27, 2019 9:29 am could just as easily go in the great outdoors thread, but think it fits better here:

People are so fucking dumb. The Estes Park guy is right. Stay the fuck away from bull elk. Mean and unpredictable. Same for moose

Tourons

Reminds me of Yellowstone Park about 45 years ago.
Blackbear with her Cubs. People walking towards them to snap photos.
Some actually expressing their desire to try and pet them.
My father asking people - are you out of your fucking mind/s?

Guess who’s back?

I honestly wouldn’t mind, and even welcome their tourism dollars, except they do things like, at breakfast a family cut the line and walked past the “please wait to be seated” sign and poached the table we had been waiting for, then threw a tantrum when the waitstaff informed them they had to wait for a table too.

Happy holidays y’all!

Sir, how would you like your eggs?

“Over hard, but still runny.”

Eggs Benedict, no butter, extra hollandaise.

Excuse me, I live downstairs and you parked in my spot. Would you mind moving your Suburban, please? Maybe pull it into the garage?

Ok okay. But do y’all really want us to do it right now? We’re all settled in and it’s cold out!

Yeah I know. But I need to park too. Tell ya what, if you don’t feel like moving then could I just park in the garage? After all, it is cold out.

...

okay we’ll move the Suburban for y’all.

I feel like I heard this same story last year.

Maybe you should move somewhere...I dunno.... less complainy?

well dang.

Sorry bro, I didn’t intend that as complaining. The exchange just gave me a giggle, and thought it may for others too, buuuut....never mind, y’all.

TDub wrote: ↑Thu Dec 26, 2019 11:13 pm I feel like I heard this same story last year.

You did, but that was a different bored.

In case there is any confusion, this thread is without question the best thread on this website. Its quality is only increased by the butthurt texans and seahawk.

Keep it up ousdahl

Thanks, cascadia.

Apologies to any posters who were offended by a request to move their suburban.

so the landlord let his kid come up and stay upstairs. bunch of college freshman on winter break.

fortunately, college freshman on winter break wouldn't ever party til the sun comes up.

wait, what?

more than anything, I'm disappointed how many times the ping pong ball has bounced across the hardwood floor. can't one of those loosers just make a cup?

So go join them. Showem how to play. If you're gonna be awake anyway...

ohhhhh!

they're playing Tech N9ne!

kids these days...

This is the town where the clowns put it down baby

Shoulda gone up....bet they had 151, Malibu rum and pineapple juice