Kansas Crimson

Ah dangit, I thought this was the satellite question thread.

But whatever, I’ll leave it here.

And…since I’m here, fuck it, gimme a bucket, and also 2 shots of jäger.

Jazz day isn't for like six months.
You and Quin Snyder will have to listen down the beach at The Sputnik with your double olive martinis.

I just tried to listen to that whole song ( is it a song--the pianist is just randomly playing chords ) to give Jazz a chance.
Nope, still awful.
I keep thinking, ok, are you done yet?

Need a bucket of Coors to clean out my ears.

Don’t just leave it at coors.

If you want jazz to sound good, try some jazz cabbage.

Pretty sure hawklin is still in the women’s restroom, if that helps.

It's the same thing with Jam bands like Phish. Dudes, can you finish your song please, it's gone on for twenty minutes.

We are cranking Petty all day today.
The Kansas game will be on but we have given up playing the audio.

Oh.

Yea, if you wanna make Phish sound good, you might need something stronger than jazz cabbage.

Hawklin still should be able to help, but worst case you could always go sniff glue in the parking lot with Dale.

I post like one jazz tune a week. Usually after I'm half-gushered. It's all good stuff. Not like I'm posting phish or something.

oh jeez.

I get just one teeny tiny little 45 minute lap dance, and you guys are never gonna let me live it down.

I made my coffee to the sounds of John Denver this morning.

I just would like to remind everyone, the Satellite Shack looks like this ( or it did when we first opened - paint's peelin' a bit, roof isn't in the greatest condition, deck is a bit worn ):



Before the night crowd:



We're on a beach. People pass out on it. It can get loud and rowdy at night.
We play sports on our shitty tvs. We have live music.
We have OK food but let's be honest, it's not great. Think Wayne N Larrys. Or 23rd Street Brewery. We do have pretty fresh conch.

Here's the front cover of our menu.


Here's the first page of the menu.


Here's our mains.

The Satellite Burger ( the works ).
The Plano burger ( yer standard ).
The Walrus roll.
A Illy cheese steak.
99 problems, pulled pork on a bun.
The Pdub Club.
Ous & Rosie ( melted cheese, lots of roast beef ).
Grandma's loaf.
The JFish.
PHD ( pork hot dog ) or the HD ( half pork, half beef ).
The Geezer Pleaser ( turkey or ham on wheat ).
Zee-Es-En ( a veggie wrap b/c you gotta ).
CnB ( chicken and a biscuit ).
DC meltdown ( meatball and melted parm ).
Tofu coach.
The Banhnewton.

We're all about cheap drinks and good times.
We play lose.
But we don't talk politics ( unless you order the Feral Fritters ), religion or money.

Take a load off, drink some rum punch or some coors, have some nachos, score some blow from Hawklin in the ladies restroom. Play some country or Nickleback on the jukebox.

Dangit, when did Newton get banned?

when he started pumping unrealistic expectations of the KU "football" team all over the place and got people excited.

I believe it's pronounced baaahh like the sheep.
The bahnnewton:

it is and they are delicious....dont forget the daikan

We have a crack sauce that goes with our feral ( conch ) fritters that may or may not have traces of what Hawklin sells - BUT, if you ask nice, you can get a side of it for the bahnewton.

someone's gotta keep Dale awake. Speaking of....someone should gather up the wax and smash it back on his candle or we're gonna be daleless

Here's the Ous & Rosie ( rip Rosie & Crooked Creek ).



And our 5 dollar rum punch.

btw Dale does all our food photography.
He also does weddings - but be sure to have your wedding earlier in the day - and maybe on a Tuesday or something.