Opposite woman question

[PhDhawk]

Ok. So this is pretty much the opposite of HD's question.

The woman I work most closely with (physically, we share the same research space) for the past 2 years, is an attractive woman in her mid-20s. She's interesting, has a good sense of humur, smart, etc.

She's never mentioned anything about a relationship...ever. We're both pretty private and don't talk about our personal lives much, but she's met my wife, and I've talked to her about my wife, etc.

I'm not even sure what her orientation is. She's never mentioned a date, or anything. She texts on her phone, sometimes makes a call.

I don't feel comfortable, and I'm not sure why, asking her about it. What do you think the deal is, especially given that HD can't ride an elevator without hearing about another woman's relationships?

[pdub]

She's bein' professional to the T.

[shindig]

Take a quick picture of her and post it up...

[PhDhawk]

I'm not gutter.

[PhDhawk]

She's bein' professional to the T.

I think you're probably right. That coupled with the fact she doesn't talk about herself much. She just mentioned to me recently that she lived in South Africa for a year, you'd think something like that would come up.

And we get along, she's invited me to social events that she's organized and stuff. Just thinking about HD's question made me think about it.

I have to assume though, since she's NEVER mentioned anything about it, that it can only mean, she's either completely celibate or she's just getting it all the time. I mean, if she had a boyfriend or any type of boring relationship that would come up SOME time. I mean, I do know that she has a yellow t-shirt.

[HouseDivided]

You apparently don’t reek of desperation and self-loathing like I do.

[PhDhawk]

ballsweat and aftershave.

[3rdGenJayhawk]

My guess is she is just super private about her personal life. Since's she's invited you to social event's I seriously doubt it's anything negative or uncomfortable. We all have different levels of comfort in regards to our personal lives.

[3rdGenJayhawk]

I mean, I do know that she has a yellow t-shirt.

Creeper. ; )

[Deleted User 183]

I'm not gutter.

When was the last time I posted a photo of a female co-worker?
Any hetero male on here would be thrilled if I did post pics of some of them.
That gives me an idea. Just kidding!

I feel there is nothing wrong with asking a woman about her dating situation unless there is something in your compliance "manual" that states you can't.

[DrPepper]

Did she grow up in the US?

[Deleted User 89]

Ok. So this is pretty much the opposite of HD's question.

The woman I work most closely with (physically, we share the same research space) for the past 2 years, is an attractive woman in her mid-20s. She's interesting, has a good sense of humur, smart, etc.

She's never mentioned anything about a relationship...ever. We're both pretty private and don't talk about our personal lives much, but she's met my wife, and I've talked to her about my wife, etc.

I'm not even sure what her orientation is. She's never mentioned a date, or anything. She texts on her phone, sometimes makes a call.

I don't feel comfortable, and I'm not sure why, asking her about it. What do you think the deal is, especially given that HD can't ride an elevator without hearing about another woman's relationships?

would your wife be comfortable with you asking her about it?

i’m with pdub...she’s being professional. no need to make it personal, as neither knows the other’s intentions

[PhDhawk]

Did she grow up in the US?

yeah

[PhDhawk]

Ok. So this is pretty much the opposite of HD's question.

The woman I work most closely with (physically, we share the same research space) for the past 2 years, is an attractive woman in her mid-20s. She's interesting, has a good sense of humur, smart, etc.

She's never mentioned anything about a relationship...ever. We're both pretty private and don't talk about our personal lives much, but she's met my wife, and I've talked to her about my wife, etc.

I'm not even sure what her orientation is. She's never mentioned a date, or anything. She texts on her phone, sometimes makes a call.

I don't feel comfortable, and I'm not sure why, asking her about it. What do you think the deal is, especially given that HD can't ride an elevator without hearing about another woman's relationships?

would your wife be comfortable with you asking her about it?

i’m with pdub...she’s being professional. no need to make it personal, as neither knows the other’s intentions

Why would my wife care?

I don't think there are intentions.

I'm just curious about someone I see and talk to every day never mentioning anything about a relationship.

[DrPepper]

Shame on you and your amatonormative beliefs. Let her be.

[PhDhawk]

Shame on you and your amatonormative beliefs. Let her be.

Wouldn't someone who's not interested in relationships say that...like you for example, this is at least the second time you've brought up amatonormative?

I communicate with her way more than I do with you.

[Cascadia]

This thread is gold. Well done PhD

[shindig]

Maybe she's single and prefers it that way so she doesn't have a reason to bring it up? Can you get her number for me?

[MICHHAWK]

I don't feel comfortable, and I'm not sure why, asking her about it. What do you think the deal is, especially given that HD can't ride an elevator without hearing about another woman's relationships?

Not sure why you would ask/discuss personal affairs with a co-worker of the opposite sex. Not sure why would care to begin with.

[pdub]

This is all made up.
PhD doesn't talk to women.
He's a microbiologist.