Kansas Crimson

1. National read a book DAY? Ok, I'll read Green Eggs and Ham toDAY. Or maybe if I have a litle more time I'll read In Search of Lost Time by Marcel Proust.
Name a book other than the Bible that you have read and had a strong influence/a lot of meaning to you - or at least that you really enjoyed.

2. You have to go to Portillo's in Chicago for a meal. It's not what it used to be but whatever. You have to order AND EAT ALL of one of the following trios - you can have whatever you want to drink. Which do you choose?
a. Italian beef and sausage combo sandwich, large cheese fries, garden side salad
b. Double burger/cheese burger, small regular fries, chicken tenders
c. Italian beef, large order of onion rings, cup of chili
d. Baked mostaccioli, greek salad, slice of chocolate cake
e. Hot dog, large regular fries, cup of chili
f. Chopped salad, tamale, cup of chicken noodle soup
g, Spicy chicken salad, small regular fries, strawberry shortcake
h. Half slab of ribs, large order of cheese fries, garlic bread


3. You are on an airplane getting ready for your flight to take off for what should be a 3 hour flight.
The person next to you has diarrhea breath. It's so bad that you can smell it when they are facing away from you. What do you do?

4. Bill Self invites you and a guest to his house for a BBQ/Grilling dinner. He tells you his wife, A.J. Storr, Elmarko Jackson, Joe Dooley and his wife, Brittney and Jackson Mahomes, Gary Hart, Paul Rudd and his wife, Nancy Pelosi and her daughter, Marylin Manson, Al Sharpton and his 14 year old grand daughter, and Pete Sampras, will be there.
You feel obligated to bring a gift to give Bill Self. What do you bring to give him?

5. I have asked a smilier question in the past but this one requires a bit more thinking.
Harris/Walz and Trump/Vance are no longer running for President. The following combos are running for President as INDEPENDANTS. Considering what you know about them politically, which combo are you voting for - if you must vote for one of them? The first name is the Presidential candidate and the second name is the Vice Presidential candidate.
a. Rudy Guilliani/Rand Paul
b. Ted Cruz/John Kasich
c. Rahm Emanuel/Tammy Duckworth
d. Al Franken/Tim Scott
e. Gavin Newsome/Meghan McCain
f. Chris Christie/Raphael Warnock
g. Andrew Yang/Jill Stein
h. Beto O'Rourke/Lauren Boebert
i. Vivek Ramaswamy/Dan Crenshaw
j. Oprah Winfrey/Nick Saban

P.S. I am not going to be able to read the responses until later this afternoon.

1. I read it long ago, but Savage Inequalities by Jonathan Kozol placed a good framework in my mind about wanting to teaching in underprivileged areas. I taught for 4 years. Idealism gave way to reality.

2. I defer to Gutter’s suggestion here.

3. If I have gum, offer some. If it’s really that bad, and they refuse, I may get up, use bathroom, and ask crew for new seat, if possible.

4. A Baconator

5. Meh

1. Floor Burns was cool. So was Bill Self: At Home In The Phog

2. B, would be C but I don't like mystery chili from fast food places.

3. Yell bomb and go to jail for a few hours.

4. A dozen ProV1x golf balls.

5. Christie and Warnock

1 - When Breath Meets Air

2 - any of it, please

3 - find a new seat (I'm a SWA guy!)

4 - wine

5 - e

1 - Beak of the Finch

2 - h, ribs

3 - change seats

4 - a bottle of Gates

5 - Emanuel/Duckworth

1. Dungeon Masters Guide
2. Never been to Portillo's so gotta try the Italian beef so a or c - i'd like to try the chili so c
3. Try to change seats.
4. Maybe a drawing/painting
5. g? Yang/Stein

1.) Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. I've read it at least ten times.
2.) I'd go with the mostaccioli combo.
3.) This is why I don't fly alone and why I reserve an aisle seat. My wife is pretty much oblivious to other people and their annoying behavior, so she can sit next to just about anyone and be fine. In summary - it would not happen.
4.) A guidebook on how to invite better guests to a party.
5.) Vivek and Crenshaw.

1) Everybody Poops
2) c. Italian beef, large order of onion rings, cup of chili. Although I don't think I could eat all of that.
3) Ignore it.
4) A nice bottle of wine.
5) d. Al Franken/Tim Scott

1. I, Robot (Asimov)
2. Unless the mostaccioli is made without dead-animal-parts I’m eating the second two thirds of that combo
3. Mask up
4. Nice bottle of a California red
5. Reluctantly Gavin

I don't think mostaccioli would be default made with a meat sauce.

1) "Let My People Go Surfing" by Yvon Chouinard
2) D. It is the least disgusting of those choices.
3) Deal with it. Better than someone who won't shut up.
4) A dozen fried pies from the Arbuckles.
5) E. Great job pairing up polar opposites. I would go with Franken, if you hadn't paired him with a dumbass.

1. I have pondered and discussed Farm Hands: Hard Work and Hard Lessons from Western New York Fields many times. The author worked at a dozen farms in my area, trying to find out why so few local residents are willing to work on farms. He picked cherries, planted onions, worked at a diary, etc. He discovered the work requires many skills, enormous willpower and physical strength. He knew the jobs would be hard, but he didn’t realize just how grueling. He lost 40 pounds that summer and whipped himself into good enough shape to run a marathon. He compared that 26.2-mile run with cabbage cutting, and declared the farm work far more exhausting.
2.d. Baked mostaccioli, greek salad, slice of chocolate cake. The place sounds Italian, so I am going with Italian. And I like chocolate cake.
3. Offer some gum. Then put on my shades and meditate to block it out. Hopefully some mouth breathing helps.
4. A jar of honey from the family bees. It is personal and consumable.
5. e. Gavin Newsome/Meghan McCain. I see the choices as mixes of affiliations, so the VP, being a heartbeat away from the leadership, is important. McCain is a never Trumper Republican and I respect that.

PROGRAM NOTE!!! I fucked up #2. for g. I meant sandwich - not salad. Which might be a difference maker.


1. The Encyclopedia/s Brittanica. Ok, I said BOOK not books. I'm probably supposed to say "The Big Book" (AA) but I am not a fan of it. Fantastic book for some. Just not for me. I'll go with Pigs Is Pigs. My father was a rare book collector. Had over 10,000 books in our home. He gave my sister a first edition Wizard of Oz (now worth a lot of money). He gave me Pigs Is Pigs (probably worth about a delivered pizza with tax and delivery).
2. Choices suck! I don't like cheese fries, I don't like mostaccioli, I don't like chili, I don't like tamales, I can tolerate ribs but I have a thing about bones so I would have to cut the meat off the bone.
I have to go with b. It's the only one I would happily eat all 3.
3. My fear is that I would puke. I would get up and tell the flight attendant I will puke unless I can change seats. If the flight attendant didn't allow me to do as such, I would VERY reluctantly tell the person their breath is making me nauseous and I may vomit. If they can please either chew a piece of gum I will give them or do something else I would appreciate it for both of our sakes.
4. A BIG bag of weed or THC gummies and tell him he can either be selfish with it or share with the guests. I would not partake.
5. I would choose c.
While they not be my first choice in terms of political reasons, it would probably be the best choice for me because there would be a damn good chance I would be involved before, during, and after their Presidency/Vice Presidency. That and Rahm and other people would be pissed at me if I didn't vote for him.